Naked much?

I went to the doctor today. I was supposed to get new medication for my shoulder because I would like to one day be able to use it again, but ended up talking about my weight loss. Last time I saw the doctor I was 297lbs, and that was only a little over a month ago. It was priceless. She walked in the room with my chart already open, and then said, "Shall we see how you're doing?" as she flipped to the front of the chart. Her draw dropped and her eyes went wide. I blurted out "I think that new scale is wrong." When I got on the scale I swear it looked like it said 284. How could I gain 10lbs in the course of one day? She said, "278?!? Wow, that's really good." In my mind I was wondering why I couldn't just take off all my clothes and weigh myself naked...that always makes me feel good. I don't think they allow that seeing as the scale is in the hallway, open for all to see. Why the hell would they put the scale somewhere that everyone could see?!? Just what an overweight person wants... I feel like saying, "Yeah, I'm a fatty...but not for long!" It's so weird to stop and reflect on the fact that this is a daily battle. I am fighting for my health, and I am winning. I can't believe how strong I am to not give up. Tonight my friend took pictures of me at a Hookah bar, and for the first time in a long time I didn't feel disgusted with myself. I can start to see the difference in my face and arms. I felt my collar bone for the first time in years too. The things you take for granted...Who ever really thinks about their collar bones? I never realized it was gone, covered by a dense layer of fat, and it wasn't until my fingers ran down my neck to the bottom of the V in my shirt that I felt it. I didn't know what it was...that's how long it's been since I felt it. I'm just now feeling comfortable with myself that I don't mind seeing myself naked. Sometimes I wonder if my neighbors ever catch a glimpse of me running from my room to the kitchen in my barely there undies, using my hands as a make-shift bra, to weigh myself. Doesn't everyone keep their scale in the kitchen? I feel pretty safe in my nudity as this happens around 6AM and most of the neighbors keep their blinds closed 24/7. Then I wonder if there is someone who watches this daily occurrence, "Is Naked Girl going to be running? Hmmm...she must have not heard her alarm." I hope they at least notice that Naked Girl is getting smaller. Then there are the bouts of paranoia. The last thing I need is to be in the news: Teacher Indicted for Nudity. I am finding a sort of confidence in this shrinking body of mine. I still have pockets of fat, otherwise known as bat wings, and my skin is sagging in a way that makes me rethink this losing weight thing, but then I remember that this body is in the middle of a metamorphosis. I am spinning my cocoon, and I will slumber, but when I break through I will be a beautiful butterfly and if all else fails I will wear the shit out of my spanx. (274)